Step Out?

October 27, 2009

I was challenge 2 months ago when one of my pastor in church resigned to live by faith and trust in God. That though stayed with me for some time and it bothered me greatly. The very though of not having a salary, not even a support group, and simply trusting God for my needs shakes me. I realize something I've never realize before, that I found my security in my monthly paycheck! Looking forward to it and relied completely in it to get me through the month. Of cause, as a pastor in Malaysia my salary was slightly inadequate, yet it paid my monthly bills, my house rent, house and car maintenance and, it also gave me a bit of enjoyment from some good food in Penang. What would I do without it, who would pay my landlord and my bills?

Through this enlightenment, I knew that God wanted me to take a step of faith, by not taking my salary the following month. "Do you trust me or your own strength to make a living?" was constantly replaying in my heart. In every step of faith, big or small, doubts are never far. Question like, is it really you God? God provides through my salary right? Etc etc.

In the middle of October, after much struggle mentally. I decide to step out of my boat(security)... I called our church accountant and told her my next step, that is to remove my salary the following month. She was a bit shock because it's something really unusual and questioned my motives. I told her that I've been preaching of God's faithfulness in providing yet so often I've only trusted in my own strength to supply my own needs. I've been a hypocrite! And furthermore as a youth pastor, I long for my youths the fireBRANDS to trust God, shouldn't I learn to trust first? This is the journey not for every pastor but it is a personal journey that God wants me to take. Finally I told her that if I believe in God, His Word and who He says He is... the faithful Shepherd, then I should be fine, very fine.

I walked out of that meeting with a mix sense of freedom, freedom from my own self-reliance and also a tiny bit of anxiousness. But there is that certain, unexplainable joy within me. Is as if Father God is smiling down, pleased to have His son trusting in Him.

Hebrews 10: 37-39 & 11:1

“For in just a little while,
the Coming One will come and not delay.
And my righteous ones will live by faith.
But I will take no pleasure in anyone who turns away.”

But we are not like those who turn away from God to their own destruction. We are the faithful ones, whose souls will be saved.

Faith is the confidence that what we hope for will actually happen; it gives us assurance about things we cannot see.

thePLAN09

Group Photo
Small Group Boys

Amanda & Rama

Have not updated for ages, just can't find the time to do so... ha ha, lame excuse.

The thePLAN09 is definitely great, mind blowing I would say. The emphasize is on Missions and Nation building and is great to see many young men and women actually responding to Go to Missions! I certainly felt like my dream being fulfill to see young Malaysian challenged to bring in the final harvest.. The Unreached People Groups! Wow... the Church in Malaysia has finally woke up with the trumpet call for the young in heart.

I've set in my heart as much as I'm able to mobilise the people that God brings into my life to reach the unreached, to send, to pray and mostly to GO. Matt 24:14

Monkey Beach

Tire but still smiling :)
Almost there...

Twins... almost la ;)

Dixon showing Le Roy how to insert a hook through a worm :)

fireBRANDS... just a few.

Youth Wave Leaders

Ikan Bakar

Our boat ride home.

At the fish farm.

James, Thomas, Me & Wilson

Just in the spent of 1 week, I've been to Pantai Monyet twice, and going there again soon during the school holidays. My first trip there was on the 29 Aug. It was the first, I think, YouthWave leader's retreat. We met up at 9am and begin our journey into the mysterious national park. A few of us even when for the canopy walk that easily beat the one in Penang Hill! After the long journey through the jungle, we finally arrived to the white sand and clear water beach. Pr. Thomas took the first dive into the sea, Pr. Daniel got tempted by coconuts and tried to climb it, while I took pride in building a fire with the help of Eng Seong. Hui Ling enjoyed digging for gold... I mean siput and James & Daniel caught some fish. What did Amos Wilson do?? Well they enjoyed themselves by talking and relaxing in the beach with the fellowship of the saints.

Last Sunday I headed again to the Monkey Beach, this time with people from the fireBRANDS! Well, the journey is kinda the same except that we when back to Teluk Bahang with a speed boat that really set our heart pumping!

After the retreat, we really got to know each other more, rather then the usual business meetings we had for the pass many years.

Penang Revolution

Since Oldtown Cafe opened, I've been there a million times. It is a great place to relax, work, study while having a cup of good old "Kopi O" or "White Coffee". Well yesterday, a few of us from Youth Wave Penang had some meaningful(unofficial) discussion about impacting youths of Penang, it was great to hear from Pragask about Recess Revo, how young people get saved and how teachers and pengetuas get touch! Daniel also shared how Penangnites can take ownership of their own Island and win it for Christ. Pastor Thomas was there too and as always, stirring coffee, I mean discussion with "Spiritual Jokes that Impacts". Darren, a young man that will be going to KDU soon was also with us. Coffee talks can really change history if one applies them into real life situations.

3 Days Rest

I'm finally giving myself some rest from work, 3 days away from my office! One of the things I planed to do is picking up a book to read and enjoying it in Starbucks with a delightful cup of mocchacino! :)

The book that I took is "Spiritual Secret of Hudson Taylor". I've learned so much even in the very first few pages. Hudson Taylor is one of the greatest missionary, and he became one because of the foundation his parents gave him as a child. They knew they were only "workers" together with God in molding young Hudson's life for His services. As a youth pastor, how I wish more parents would see themselves as the Taylor's did, workers together with God in bringing up their children for the very purpose God have design them to fit into.

Taylor spent 51 years in China. The society that he began was responsible for bringing over 800 missionaries to the country who began 125 schools and directly resulted in 18,000 Christian conversions, as well as the establishment of more than 300 stations of work with more than 500 local helpers in all eighteen provinces. -Wikepedia

Christian Fellowship

I was given the opportunity to preach in SMK Bukit Jambul's CF on the 26th June 2009. Tania invited me a week earlier and I gladly said yes. My message "Internalizing the Reality of God" isn't a new one but I did edited the power point to make it simpler and added more directive pictures that illustrated my message. It was fun there was lots of responses and my prayer for that CF is that it will continue to grow spiritually and also numerically.

It is really encouraging to see young people passionately serve God and making history in their school!

Lawas Outreach

The Lawas Outreach 7 - 13 June 2009 was planned after the cancellation of the Phang-Nga Outreach, Thailand. (Pro 16:9 We can make our plans, but the Lord determines our steps.) I guess that God knew what He was doing after all and I needed to trust Him in every situation.

The planning started many months before June, I was trying to co-ordinate the logistics, transportations and possible ministry opportunities in Lawas together with Pr Sumping Gawan, a friend we came to know during his stay in Penang with his wife Elizabeth and two sons, Evan and Aaron. Planning this trip was exceptionally difficult due to the unpredictable culture of the people in Lawas, Pr. Sumping always tells me over the phone "don't worry about anything... just come." Being an "ahead of time planner" I have to again trust God with the unknown and unforeseen.

As we depart on the 7th of June, events just fell into place as if God was a few steps in front of us! We arrived at Kota Kinabalu the 1st day and was pick up by Richard Sigar, a man with a few words but gentle as a dove. He drove us pass the border of Sabah to Sarawak and we arrived at Maktab Injil Malaysia in the evening. It took us 3 hours but it felt short because the journey to Lawas was painted with beautiful scenery of the Boneo continent.

We were welcome by Elizabeth and her 2 sons and we stayed at her house for the night. The girls Sarah Khoo, Joyce Lim, Tricia Yeoh, Tania Loke, Sharon Leow, Sarah Wong and my wife all squeezed into one room while Jin Ji (the only guy in the team) and me shared a big room to ourselves.

We were transferred to 4 different villages during the next four days, the first is Kg. Pengalih, second Kg. Air Terjung Batu Empat (one of the most exiting place for me), third Kg. Meriting and finally Kg. Baru. In all the four villages we were largely involve with the evening services. I preached every night while the team did their dance performance, skid and shared their testimonies. Jin Ji even had the opportunity to translate one of my messages and 2 testimonies. We were bless with some interesting adventures too during our stay in the villages, swim in the river and waterfall, took a river boat ride, saw the mangrove and enjoyed the breeze beside a huge river.

One of the things I've experience, or maybe learned the most came from the hospitality of the Lun Bawang people. Everyone is over kind, loves to shake our hands and fed us generously (six meals a day). I don't remember any time that I have felt a little hungry at all! The Lun Bawangs makes me feel as if they were close relatives... well, maybe a bit closer, even though I was a complete stranger.

I will try to be hospitable from now on and value relationships above task. "We cannot serve God unless we serve people, we cannot serve people if we don't have time." I asked the team to define "success in life" in comparison to the Lun Bawangs, for me, they are much more successful then a business man living in a high class apartment in Kuala Lumpur. Most of the people have lands, sufficient food, big houses, and most importantly, great relationships and strong families.

The only thing that was difficult for me was the humid weather that causes me to sweat constantly. Ha ha, if God sends me to Lawas, the first thing I would purchase is definitely an air-con!

Another significant lesson I learn from this trip as an outreach leader is that communication is so crucial, knowing my teammates and helping them all the way through is not an easy task. I'm the one who would always wake up first and go to bed the last, my mind is always analysing upcoming ministry, people, food, money, safety, solutions to complains and problem, etc, etc, while preparing my message mentally the same time. All this has brought me a tremendous appreciation for my DTS leader Chad who at the age of 23 when he took team of 20 people to Thailand and Bangladesh for 2 month. Through this I've also learned the leadership of Jesus that is to constantly love, serve, rebuke, correct and ministered without rest, but with the strength drawn from the Father. What can we do without Him.

We head back to Kota Kinabalu on the 12Th and was bless greatly staying in a nice apartment with AIR-CON and a swimming pool. Pr. Smping and his family came with us and we spend the day together. We woke up early on the 13Th and flew back to Penang at 7am. Saying good bye is never easy after such hospitable and genuine relationships. But, in the Iban & Lun Bawang culture there is never a "good bye" but "I'll see you gain..."